Wednesday, September 18, 2013

10 years down, the rest of her life to go

After you've done something for ten years, you would like to feel like you are doing it right.  In most professional fields, a decade of experience is a time frame that elicits confidence and admiration from other people.  A surgeon tells you, "I have been performing that procedure for ten years."  Sounds good, doc, cut me open.  A broker says, "I have been investing peoples' money since 2003."  Awesome, Mr. Moneybags, where do I sign?  We equate the length of time a person has done something with how good they are at it.  Usually, this is a fair indicator of the results we can expect.  There is no substitute for experience.  However, what do you do when after ten years of doing something everyday, you still are not sure if you are doing it all right?

Today is my daughter's birthday.  From the title of this blog post, you can probably guess that she turned ten years old.  I was lying in bed last night remembering what I was doing in 2003:  I was waiting for my cervix to dilate.  It was taking its time because I was at the hospital nearly 24 hours before I delivered my baby girl.  She was beautiful, perfect, and they handed her to me like I was supposed to know what to do.  Luckily, between my years working at an OB/GYN office with amazing nurses, doctors, and moms, my skimming through What to Expect When You're Expecting, and that natural maternal instinct, I took her home and managed to raise her.  Every day, I kissed her.  Every day, I told her I loved her.  Every day, I told her how important she is to this world.  I still do every one of these things every day.  I also ask myself every day, "After ten years, am I doing this right?"

There is no way to describe parenting.  Probably because it is not an experience, it is a life.  Like life, we have to take it day by day.  It doesn't matter that those whom have more experience than us try to guide, shelter, and show us the way.  We usually do not listen to all the advice we are given, for we all feel our lives ultimately must be shaped by ourselves.  We have to say it to hear it. We have to do it to feel it.  We have to lose it to appreciate it.  When it comes to parenting a daughter (or two, in my case), all I can hope for is a baby that grows into a smart girl that changes into a confident adolescent that moves into a goal-driven teenager and ends up an accomplished woman.  Too much to ask?  Yes, it is.  I have come to terms with the fact that I am going to make mistakes.  It does not matter how hard I try to make her perfect, she is going to need to say it, do it, and lose things on her own to make her life hers.  I will always be there to support her. 

Happy birthday, baby girl.  Live your life...as long as I am always in it.

2 comments:

  1. Kim in Indy10/10/2013

    Awesome, Mr. Moneybags, where do I sign?

    By far the funniest thing I have read today. Thank you for the good laugh! :)

    I have 2 daughters also (7 & 4 - and a son, 3). I think that if someone is wise enough to know what is important (kindness, respect, love, etc) and wise enough to wonder if they are doing it right, they are.

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