(sniff sniff) I Smell Pants on Fire

You are a liar.  You.  You reading this right now.  You are a liar.  If you say you aren't, that's a lie.  I have never lied.  See, it is that easy.  I will admit that I am a liar. We all are.  I do not care who you are, at one or more times in your life (or today), you have told a lie.  I see lies the same way I see hand guns:  some people are responsible with them, and some people are careless and dangerous with them.

There are as many types of lies as there are lies themselves.  There are, "little white lies," "lies of omission," "exaggerations," and, "blatant, out-and-out lies."  Moses told us that lying is something thou shalt not do.  But, I bet even Moses had a time or two that he told his wife, "No, Zipporah, this desert air does not make your skin look ashy.  You look fine."  The hardest thing when it comes to lying is knowing when it is o.k. to do.  I know...a lot of you are thinking that it is never o.k. to lie.  Sure it is.  Sometimes we have no other choice than to tell a fib.  Do you want an example?  How about, "Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus."  There is one that we all have lied about, so now you can all officially say, "Yes, (technically) I am a liar."

There are definitely lies that I feel are harmless.  There are also lies that can be devastating.  In all honesty, I have told both kinds of these lies at some point in my life.  Am I proud to say that?  No, but I am being honest.  What may seem like a harmless lie to one person can be a devastating lie to another.  This is what makes lying tricky.  If you definitely want to hurt another person, if you want to destroy your own character, or if you want to alienate yourself from friends and family, a big ole lie will do all of these.  If you want to lift a friend's self esteem, tell a dying relative that they will get better, or make a child believe in something magical, a different kind of lie can accomplish these.  I cannot tell anyone how they need to determine when and how to lie.  It is even difficult to explain my own method to this lying madness.  Is it o.k. if the lie is protecting someone?  Is it alright to lie until the person can better understand the real truth?  For me, if the lie makes me feel guilty, I know it is not a lie that should be told.  If the guilt is there, that tells me that it is time for the truth.  Lies have their place in our lives, but they should never be told more often than the truth.  Sometimes the truth hurts more than a lie, so we all need to be aware of how to best treat a situation.

I had to have the, "Santa," talk with my 9 year-old daughter this past holiday season.  She had questioned the Easter bunny's existence last spring, but we kind of ignored those inquiries.  After three times of asking about the guy in the red suit, we decided to tell her the truth.  My husband and I sat her down and told her the truth.  She looked us both in the eye, started to cry and said, "You mean for 9 years you've been lying to me?!?!"  I sympathetically looked at her and calmly said, "Yes, we have."  After a while of talking and hugs, she understood that this is a lie that parents tell their kids.  I also told her she is now in on one of the biggest secrets in the world.  Since we also have a 7 year-old daughter, I said, "Now, can you not say anything to your little sister about this?"  She smiled and nodded, then she proudly say, "I'll make sure she doesn't know.  I'll act like there really is a Santa."  Awww, look.  My daughter is growing up to be a little liar.